freshman slump

It's been a rather busy few weeks and even more so because as i'll be away from work for just under three weeks from tomorrow (no, not for a vacation, not a typical one anyways), over the past week or so especially i've been dealing with a lot of work that has to be done before i go away, lest i come back to an avalanche of issues to deal with (though actually, either way, that will probably still be the case).

And in the midst of all this i must say that, for what it was worth, whatever initial euphoria there was at being liberated from the chains of nie has long since vanished. It has since been replaced by plenty of last-minute scrambling to settle what i should do for each upcoming lesson, more than one's rightful fair share of non-essential work to deal with, and, perhaps worst of all, class upon class of dissatisfied customers who are getting more and more comfortable with being openly unappreciative of the lessons i conduct.

Here, i have to say that the latter is far from being entirely unjustified. I must admit that a lot of my lessons nowadays, if they were to be used for assessment purposes, could not be saved by the wayang-est of wayangs. Yup. The dreaded chalk-and-talk, or to be entirely accurate, marker-and-talk. That's due, i'd like to think, to not being able to find enough time to prepare for a sustained period of quality lessons. Perhaps though, it may also have to do with mental fatigue - the rather novel ideas that used to come to me rather naturally are now buried somewhere in the deep recesses of my mind, if they're even there anymore. And also that honestly, the students nowadays (oh i feel so old just typing that) are much harder to appease that those of not even more than just ten years ago. Many a time have my virtual hands throttled the virtual neck of many a student. But well, at least idealistically speaking, i did think i was better than that.

But anyways, whatever the cause, the fact remains, and come to think of it, as badly timed as this involuntary break from work is, on the other hand it's also perfectly timed, that is, of course, if there'll be sufficient time for me to escape, if not mentally, then at least physically, from work, and possibly achieve that most elusive of goals, recharge myself for the remaining school year (where much more awaits). Who would've thought eh..